Before I had ever kissed anyone, I figured liplock would be similar to the long, sunset-hued sessions on The Love Boat.  I’d be there, in my off-the-shoulder dress and we’d gaze at each other before leaning leaning leaning and then joining mouths until Isaac or Doc interrupted us for the conga line on the lido deck.

In high school, I saw A Room with a View and the hot, agrarian surprise kiss from George in the field Phew. The Love Boat had kissing but mainly they had Doc making moves on people on the lido deck.